Monday, September 19, 2011

Facebook Who the F are you and is Andrew Zimmern wrapping it up?

This week's podcast was another "Who the F*ck are you?" Facebook game special. In case you missed the first special, the rules of the game are simple. One person looks at the other person's Facebook friends list, reads some info on that friend (birthplace, marital status, favorite movies, etc.) and then asks the question - who the Fuck are you? If the friend is not called out then that person gets boot from the friends list. That's simple but yet so much fun. In the first episode I saved 5 out of 7 friends. Saved friends: Annmarie Dalton Kote, Larry Ianuzzi, Pete Caballero, Josh Morrison and Johanna Jorgensen. Booted: Charlene Michalkowski Anderson and Jamie Hobbie.

Sir Axman was not so proficient going 0 for 3 losing Some crazy girl from the south with the same last name, Dan Stencel, and Carl Archer.

Take a listen to see how Sir Axman redeemed himself and how we both waxed poetically about our favorite Milf.

One more thing this week...I have a habit of comparing people. For instance, I recently met someone in business and when asked what my impression was of this person my response was I didn't know Gabe Kaplan. Anyway, I want to share one of these observations with you. I recently read a Facebook entry from a friend about a "close call" and a battle with a rabbit. I've had a few of these scare over the course of my adult life and and right away my thoughts go to reliving the situation and feeling the bad, the worse, then the Euphoria when the crisis is averted. This whole thing got me time wrap it up. That's right, just like the song by 80's band The Fabulous Thunderbirds. When looking at this recent video of them, is it me or is the lead singer Andrew Zimmern? Well, that's up to you to decide.

Thanks for stopping by and let me know if you would like to try your hand at Facebook Who the fuck are you. We would love to have you on the podcast. Slap it, flip it and dip it!

Monday, August 29, 2011

Avatar: the last Colon Bender

During the podcast this week I talk about how I have become Avatar: The Colon Bender. Yes I am not the Last colon bender as we all know many of us exist. I was just startled at the revelation that I have joined a club that, just a mere few years ago, I would have been horrified to be associated with. Listen to the podcast to get the details on how I discovered that I am indeed part of the colon benders. Things took a turn for the worse when we discuss the proper etiquette of dropping #2 at the office. Special thanks to RotoRay and D-Will for showing me the way of 14Th floor, left stall.

Also this week, Sir Axman and I told a few stories from the casino including playing bingo, excessive drinking, cigar smoking, poltergeist orgasms and other wholesome activities.

Random thought from this week's show - I entered a word into, see it here! Yes, I am Shamus Mcfly - Don't ask.

Sir Axman and I finish up this week wondering why people think it is OK to bring their kids to the casino. Why? Because they are assholes. We leave singing along to one of our favorite ska tunes, Lorraine by Bad Manners. Until next time, SLAP IT!

Sunday, August 21, 2011

Check out my Podcast damn it!

You should know by now that I co-host a podcast. Please spread the word, subscribe for free on iTunes, and follow me on twitter (@sirkayak or @Vaderloveswdw). The podcast will be out weekly and we are using some grassroots and simple advertising to grow our audience. We have a website that is constantly evolving and hope you all enjoy listening to the clown gospel. Until next time - Slap it, flip it and dip it!

Monday, June 20, 2011

When can I take my kids to a game?

It's time for some blogging....I'm thinking I will try to post more blogs of smaller length as to not go seasons in between posts.

A quick vent on sports or more specific, NY sports. Anyone who knows me well knows I live for the NY Rangers. For all my pals who hate them, call them the Gaboriks, love the Devils (ugh), Islanders (haha), or Philadelphia (at least you have parking wars) are missing out. An original six team, playing in the greatest city in the world. I know we are terribly run and the ticket prices are going up, AGAIN....but I love them. It's a bitter relationship that hasn't had an all night sex session since '94. On the plus side the Flyers and Islanders have had longer cup draughts than us and the Devils, although they had the success of 3 cups in a short amount of time, play in Newark and have only one true fan. Anyway, back to my ticket prices are going up again. Yes I will pay it, we will be mediocre, I will be upset and the cycle continues. Plus, I can't take my kids. I keep wanting to take Patrick to a game but the language during a game would make a sailor blush. I really want to expose my boys to the game and team I love so much but that day is on hold for now.
I thought about taking them to a Yankee game but you mix $12 beers and NY sports you usually get an out of control crowd. Giants games are no better... Maybe I need to go outside my fan zone. Jets? Newark Bears? Both bad options for different reasons. Maybe it might be time to look at the Mets. The team might be consistently mediocre but your $6 ticket will get you a different kind of bleacher creature.
There is plenty of time for me to expose them to this nonsense that I love so dearly. For the time being I will keep taking them to my other favorite place where the only person cursing is me when my bill arrives when I check out.

Friday, January 21, 2011

No way to run a candy store: Happy New Year

No way to run a candy store: Happy New Year: "Hey all... Happy new year! Time to start the year new and make this one better than the last... New year's resolution #1 - Live for today ..."

Monday, January 17, 2011

Happy New Year

Hey all...

Happy new year! Time to start the year new and make this one better than the last...

New year's resolution #1 - Live for today and try to be happy. I have spent a long time dwelling on the negative and I get into the rut of being the master of melancholy. Life is short so this year I am going to try and have as much fun as my bank account will allow. I booked a vacation in April to celabrate my 40th and I got rooms for my wife and kids, my brother from another mother - the axman, the one and only JV and my pops. Three rooms at Disney's Old Key West resort....the possibilites are endless.

I'm kicking around a few ideas for mancation as well and leaning towards a few trips but I have to talk to ax and set something in stone....whatever it is it will be a blast.

I want to hit some festivals, old stomping grounds, go back to the usual Halloween festivities, still waste many nights sitting in MSG hoping for the electricity that only that building can bring, and anything else I can afford and have fun.

The reason for my attempt to live for today and live to be happy? My mom passed away 40 days ago but I'm not counting. It's put me in such a funk. Her passing has changed me. I can't call her and get comfort, advice, anything. If your mom is alive make sure you try and stay tight with her no matter what. You only get one mom and when she is gone it changes me.

Resoulution #2 - Spend more time with my little group. Friends and family is what life is all about. You know who you are (or you should) and this is the year I make a big effort to see them more. I'm getting an itch for some gaming and over indulgence!

Resolution #3 - Move. Time for a new place. A bigger place. It starts on Sunday with a meeting with Dale.

Resolution #4 - Take care of my back. I hurt it...AGAIN. I plan on continuing my strenuous workouts but I need to maintain a healthy back. Starts tomorrow with an appointment with the best spine doctor around.

Resolution #5 - Be a better dad. I love my 2 boys but I need to put more time into their development. They look at me as the guy that takes them to Disney 3 or 4 times per year, gets them all the video games and toys they want but I want them to form a better bond with me as they get older. I love my dad and he worked multiple jobs and did what he had to do to provide for us and get me what I wanted but we never formed a tight emotional bond. I'm going to try my best to do that with my boys.

Resolution #6 (yes that's right 6...if I make enough of them law of averages say I will succeed in some, right?) - Get more satisfaction out of my job. I need to rejuvinate myself at the office. I'm going to be at my current job for 4 years come March 12th and it's time to recharge the batteries. Like I said in the beginning of this life is too short not to be happy and I need to find a way to get that satisfaction out of my job again. I have come to realize that I'll never have the warm and fuzzy environment that I had at my last place of employment but there are great folks where I am now and good people on my team and I need to reset the game for 2011, adjust to all the changes that I had endured at work in the 2nd half of the year or make drastic changes.

This is the year I start enjoying all aspects of's to 2011.

Be well....and stick to your resolutions!

Monday, November 22, 2010

Thanksgiving, Facebook friends, cougars, ink...etc.

It's been a while since I felt the urge to throw some thoughts out there but I needed to make some space between the ears so for the next couple minutes keep reading all the crap that is going into the brain recycle bin.

First - Thanksgiving, my most hated of all holidays, is upon me and I must celebrate it. Why? Because I have 2 little boys that have been brainwashed my the Hoboken school system that this is a great day. My oldest boy came home talking about the first Indian and blah blah blah...also had a picture he made of a turkey leg with blue pants and an indian headress on with the sentence next to it "I am thankful for me because I am good. Patrick". I have a whole vision of Thanksgiving but as a dad I will not rain on the fun. As long as there is football, grub, and few comforts to ease the pain all will good.

Second - My wife deep sixed her Facebook account. I'm impressed as I think she was addicted to it like I was to another computer program and I know it is difficult to step away. Her reasoning brings me back to one of my posts from over the summer. I was bent out of shape because she was hurt by some friends all getting together and not asking her...over and over. Quick flashback - I went on to explain that only a few of us are blessed enough to have real friends (friends help you move, real friends help you move a body) and yes I am happy to have one of those. Anyway, she dropped Facebook because the holidays are approaching and she didn't want to see all the pictures from the parties that she (we) won't be invited to. Wasn't the only reason, there were lots of folks on her page that she really didn't care about...ya know the facebook friends that you knew another lifetime ago, or that random one nighter when you had that layover flight in Houston, or that guy you had to report to a few jobs ago that you can buy and sell now...etc. etc. Sigh...getting back on track, she is right on with that thought pattern...that's why I love the wife. We think alike. We just don't give a fuck. Pefect pair...don't get me wrong there are people I (we) do care for and about and the people in the inner circle know we are the most loyal of commrades but as far as the rest of the world well you give what you get. I told her over the summer and I'm telling her know the people that mean the most to you so make time for them - it will make you happier in the long run. Hey Axman, if you're reading this - Martinis, cigars, Bobby Flay's steakhouse and some baccarat on Saturday night, can't wait.

Third - I witnessed some big time cougartown stuff a few days ago. Listen, I'm not the moral police but if you are married and my kids know your kid(s), why make it so obvious that you are going to cheat on your significant other with someone half your age. Do what you like by all means but don't make it so obvious where people openly talk about it. It makes you look trashy and that's ok but if your kid finds out then you're just a douche. Get a divorce if you're unhappy but tell the other person of your need to end it before moving on. Trust me,in the long run it will be better for all parties involved.

Fourth - December 10th - getting my full tattoo sleeve worked on by one of the most kick ass ink slingers on the east coast. If you ever wanted some ink go here...I go to Cisco but you can't go wrong with any artist here.

Finally - If you are religeous, spiritual, human, whatever...positive thoughts are needed for mom. She is fighting hard and is in the final rounds and all the positive thoughts, energy, and prayers help. Tell the people closest to you that they are loved and important every day because life is so short.

Till next time...